Pillowbook of Prudence…

On loss… Today a group of us grieve the passing away of a courageous friend. Losses like these conspire to remind us sometimes briefly, sometimes in more detail of other losses that have occurred throughout our lives.

And whilst there is inevitably grief, the losses enable one to recall the positives inherent in the relationship with the person or even the thing that one has lost.

Very wise Buddhists say that the very act of ‘holding on’ is what causes the pain: what they call ‘attachment’. When one gives up the attachment, the pain eases.

So on this 10th day of September, I recall the vivacity, humour and wit of my friend, the fine needlework she accomplished, her love for her family and friends. And I am happy to let her go because she had done what she set out to do: which was to add so much value to my life and everyone else she touched.

And what would a Pillowbook be without a reference to black clothes?

This same friend has requested that no one wear black to her memorial service. Ah, she’s a woman after my own heart!